HAVE MUSLIMS RIPPED OFF CLIFF RICHARD?

COULD THE METRIC SYSTEM GIVE CLIFF RICHARD DIABETES?

COULD THE E.U. TURN HARD-WORKING FAMILIES GAY?

IS RIP-OFF BRITAIN MAKING BRITAIN'S SWANS OBESE?

HAVE LESBIANS IMPREGNATED HOMEOWNERS?

WILL THE NANNY STATE HAVE SEX WITH THE CHURCH?

.... all of these are important questions, and all of them have been created via Chris Applegate and his ingenious DAILY MAIL-O-MATIC!